Jon's Crossover Crisis
by Garfield fan 1
Summary: Crossover between Garfield, Peanuts, Get Fuzzy and FoxTrot. Special thanks to Mr. Scream for story ideas.
1. Prologue part 1

**Okay, first lemme clear some stuff up-  
Bucky Katt and Satchel Pooch can talk.  
Snoopy can only communicate with thoughts & telepathy to other animals  
Garfield can communicate with either thoughts or telepathy.  
**THIS IS A SHOUT.  
**THIS IS AN EXTREME SHOUT.  
**_**THIS IS A REALLY EXTREME SHOUT  
**__This is a whisper or an action._  
**And one more thing before I shut up;**

**Jim Davis and Paws, Inc own Garfield, Odie, Arlene, Nermal, Jon, and all of those people.  
Bill Amend owns Marcus and the Fox family.  
Darby Conley owns Bucky Katt & Satchel Pooch.  
Charles M. Schulz owns Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Woodstock, 5, Franklin, Patty, Marcie, the van Pelts, and all the other kids.**

Okay?

It was sunny in Calville-

**Oh, right. This isn't a Calvin & Hobbes fanfic.**

It was sunny in Jasonopolis. Paige-o-Tron had no place in this city!

Marcus: Duuhhh, excuse me, Senor Peaceful, when do we get to the action?!  
Jason: Shuddup, Marcus! *starts bashing head* I'm trying to think!  
Marcus: *rolls eyes* Right.  
Jason: This is a back-to-front book! Peace starts the story!

_Paige was tanning herself. Peter was eating a lot of tacos thanks to their new DIY Taco Kit. Andy & Roger were discussing how repetitive they say some new fanfic is going to be._


	2. Prologue Parts 2, 3 & 4

It was sunny in Bucktopia. Pinkies had no place in this city!

Bucky: Duuhhh, excuse me, Senor Sceptico, who's autobuckography is this?!  
Robert: Shuddup, Buck! *starts bashing head* It's not a biography! None of this actually happened! You're gonna have to list this as fiction, if ANY publisher is idiotic enough to actually disgrace themselves by slapping their logo on it and printing a copy or two.  
Bucky: *rolls eyes* Right.  
Robert: Plus, this is a back-to-front book! Your fame starts the story! You're never gonna be famous! Face it!

_Satchel was taking a nap. Fungo Squiggly was moping around because he now has to live with Bucky, likewise with Bucky a few hours earlier. Chubby Hugs & Whitey were locked in a hug while discussing how repetitive some new fanfic is going to be, while at the same time Whitey was offering a hug-dummy in exchange for Chubs hugging Bucky until his pelvis is crushed due to Bucky not paying his gambling debt for betting the Raiders would win the Super Bowl._

* * *

It was sunny in Peanutsville. Lucy had no place in this city!

Charle Brown: Uuhhh, excuse me, Shermy and 5, what are you doing?  
Shermy: Shuddup, Charlie Brown! We're writing a story and we're gonna get it published!  
Charlie Brown: Don't. I know the ugly truth.  
5: $o, I don't get all the credit and all the money?  
Charlie Brown: 5, Shermy's lying...

_Peppermint Patty was playing football. Marcie was sucking at it and at the same time being upset that a scout might sign her up to play for Wayne Gretzgy's football team. Lucy was screaming at Linus for saying how repetitive some new fanfic is gonna be. Snoopy was sleeping on his doghouse._

* * *

It was sunny in Muncie, Indiana. Those other comics had no place in this city!

Garfield: Duuhhh, excuse me, Senor Peaceful, when do we get to the action?!  
Jason: Shuddup, Garfield! We're only halfway there!  
Garfield: HALFWAY?! You know that it's not worth it to walk for two minutes to get to Binky Burger!  
Jon: Garfield...

_Odie was running around in circles. Nermal wasbeing obnoxious. Arlene was thinking how repetitive they say some new fanfic is._


	3. Prolougue part 5

**Warning: The first three paragraphs are T rated.**

One night, while the Foxes were sleeping, a gang came.

Roger: _What's that?  
_Andy_: I don't know, Roger, but I'm scared.  
_Roger_: Good thing I keep this gun under my bed, Andrea._

**The rest is pretty much K.**_  
_

As the men attacked, Andy got the kids into the basement. The police soon arrived and told Mr. and Mrs. Fox that new statistics show that parents that have been attacked in the night are worse parents than those who havn't.

Cop 1: I'm sorry, Mrs. Fox, but you'll have to put your kids up for adoption.  
Roger: Okay. I'll get on eBay.  
Cop 2: Wow, usually parents like you get really strict but-  
Jason: Nah, Dad's always that dumb.  
Paige: Daddy lost his credit card in the iFruit's CD drive.  
Peter: He thinks "Backing Up" a computer means pushing it off the back of the desk.  
Andy: How'd you get out?  
Jason: Long story. It would take an exasecond.  
Andy: That doesn't seem too long.  
Jason: Actually, you're right. The Earth hasn't even been around for that long.  
Paige: I have a bad felling about this... I know I do, but it's worse than the bad feeling I'm used to.  
Peter: Could you translate that from nerdspeak to Jock speak?  
Jason: An exasecond is, eh... roughly 32 billion years.  
Peter: That's the least intelligent thing you've ever said.  
Paige: That's the most intelligent thing you've ever said.

* * *

LATER...

Jon: Liz, I don't believe you are now Dr. Liz Arbuckle.  
Liz: I told you, we have an agreement. I'm Dr. Mrs. Liz Wilson, You're Mr. Jon Arbuckle. The daughters will be Wilsons & the sons will be Arbuckles.

Garfield: Hmmm... Jon! Jon!  
Jon: Yes my snoogywoogiepookumsugg... Okay I'll shut up, Cupcake.  
_It's amazing what love can do to people, like wanting to have those #$&%?! tail-pulling babies, _thought Garfield.

Garfield: Jon!; There's kids up for adoption! Their names are... Paige, Peter and Mr. Spock Fox.  
Jon: Paige, Peter and Jason Fox?! Those are the cokids of my kidworkers! Come on, Garfliz, we're towning to go!  
Garfield: Oh, brother.


	4. Prologue Part 6

Peter: *sigh.* I miss the good ol' days of "WELCOME TO iFruit. HUG ME."

Jason: Dad! You got any... more stuff?!

Jon: Jason, I'm a business tycoon! I inherited the cartooning company after the last owner passed away!

Paige: Now I've got mixed feelings. I get all the stuff I want, but Jason does too.

Jon: OOHHH, KIDS! I COME BEARING... EVIDENCE!

Jason: My dart guns!  
Paige: My archery dart bow!  
Peter: *starts to cry* My iFruit! *falls and hugs iFruit*  
iFruit: Access Granted.

_Jason quickly slams a disc into the iFruit._

Jason: PORTAL 3 BETA FEVAAAAR!

Paige: That... was NOT the CD Drive, Jason...  
Jason: Oh?  
Peter: That was... the cooling fan...

Jason: *dramatic "no"* And I had snagged the only copy! They... VALVE SENT ME THE ONLY BETA COPY! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Paige: Wow. Jason really IS that dumb.  
Jon: They sent you a spare.

_Jason slams the disc into the iFruit._

Peter: Jason...  
Paige: That was the Internet capability. so now you can't use iFruit Platinum. Or Ethernet Wanderer. Or Zoo. Or Opera Singer. Or Waterlion. Or-  
Jason: I GET IT!

Jon: Two spares.

_Jason carefully places it into the CD Drive. It quickly snaps back and knocks the iFruit at the wall._

Jason: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

_Portal 3 plays._

Wheatley: Hello? This place is again- oh, wait, I can just open it. Hello? can you speak yet?  
Chell: Yes.  
Wheatley: Still jumping. No wait!  
GLaDOS: (Over PA, sarcastically) Woah! She talks!

Jason: WOOOOOOOO!

Paige: Yunno, I think that Jason might have flipped his lid.  
Peter: Operation Soaring Eagle?  
Paige: You get the hunger games stuff. I get the bow and darts.


	5. The Prologue's Epilogue AKATheMovieTitle

Jason: Wow... a new father... another check on my to-do-before-I-get-old,-marry-and-get-cooties-list . Lucky I'm 10, The Pimply One is 13, and Peter is 16.  
Jon: Hi, gang!  
Jason: Hi... Dad...  
Jon: You already think of me as a father? Thanks, J.

* * *

Paige, Peter & Jason were at the fair. They saw a "Pet Section". One man was selling a cat for 1c and a dog for $20. There was also a bald-with-a-long-hair-on-his-forehead kid selling a "crazy" dog for $10.

Paige: Ohhh, Daddy reeeeeally owes us a gift for helping me maintain an A+++ average, you, Jason, an A++++++++++ average, and you, Peter, a D+ average.

Jason: So you're finally calling him your dad, too.

Peter: I still consider first name "Archibald Bert Chris Enos Fanboy Gert Harold Ignor Jason Kerosene Larry Mini Noma Opal Pierre Q*Bert Roger Snakey Terkey Undalin Verizon Wart Xavier Yellow Zack" middle name "Dee" last name "Fox" maiden name "dee Idiot" as my father.

Jason: That's the second longest name I've ever seen.  
Paige: What's the longest?  
Jason: The real name of Bangkok.

_Paige walks up to the counter with a nickel, a ten dollar note, and 20 quarters in her hand._

Paige: I'd like to buy the dog, sir.  
Robert: Fifteen dollars.

_Paige hands the man (Robert) the $10 note and the twenty quarters._

Robert: You want the cat? Only a penny.  
Paige: I'll give you a nickel.  
Robert: Done.  
Paige: Done.  
Peter: Done.  
Jason: Done! Woooooo!

Paige: I'll call the cat "Cutiecat" and the tubby dog "Cutiepuff"!  
Bucky: HEY! I'll go to H*** and back before I answer to the name "Cutiecat"! I'm **The** Bucky Katt and He's "Moron"!  
Satchel: Buck, my name's "Satchel Pooch", not "Moron".

Jason & Peter: Thank the Lord. Cutiecat and Cutiepuff are horrible names.

Paige: Oh, look! The other dog seems to like eating lots of pizza at every meal.

Peter: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! PLEASE DON'T! PLEASE DON'T! PLEEEASE DOOOON'T!

Charlie Brown: You scream funny.

Paige: Oh? how do you scream?

Charlie Brown: I scream "AUUGH!"

Peter: And that Arbuckle guy screams "YAAAHH!"...

Paige: Here's $20.  
Charlie Brown: *Sigh* Here's my- I mean- your dog.  
Peter: I understand how you feel. Actually, I feel worse.  
Charle Brown: *sniff* That's... *sniff* impossible...  
Paige: Awwww, he'sh sho cute! I'mma name him "Cutiepuff, Jr."!  
Charlie Brown: Please... His name... is Snoopy...

Paige: Oh... sorry... Wait a minute...

All: **_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! THE_**** SNOOPY?!**

Peter: I swear, Paige. If you adopt one more thing, you are hitchiking home. Don't anger the chauffeur.

_As the Fox kids turn to leave, Paige feels a heavy weight on her right leg. It's Charlie Brown, dragging himself on the ground._

Charlie Brown: Please, take me with you.

Paige: Pleeeease? He is sooooo cute!

Jason: Okay. You're right. *kisses the top of Charlie Brown's head* It's like kissing a peanut!

_Peter & Jason burst out laughing. This was THE most embarrassing moment in Charlie Brown and Paige's entire lives._

Peter: That's it, Paige. That car will not have a female in it for the next two hours.

Peter ran to the car and dived through the passenger window into the driver's seat. He found the back of the car already loaded with Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Bucky and Satchel, and Paige was trying to get in. Peter drove off, and Paige fell out the open rear passenger door. The others crammed into the right-hand rear seat.

Peter: JASON! HURRY!

Jason and Paige chase the car. as Jason is about to jump in, Paige whacks his face with a backhand slap and hops on the roof. Peter sets the car on autopilot and joins Paige in one of those fights on a car roof that defy the laws of physics. The car soon starts veering left and right and stops frequently changing speeds. Paige falls and grabs the rear bumper hanging on for dear life.

Peter: Maybe Jason is steering, and maybe he's got Cruise Control on.

Paige hears this and makes a really athletic, maybe even impossible, dive into the car, she throws Jason out the now-open driver side window so far he disappears and she beckons Peter back in. Paige draws Roger Fox's gun.

Paige: Daddy would want you to keep driving.

Peter: If he did, we wouldn't be adopted!

Peter drifts left and catches the gun in his right hand. did I mention that they own a right-hand-drive car? Peter throws the gun in his footwell and drives back through oncoming traffic and stops at the fair, almost running Jason over. Paige rebounds off the windscreen and through the back window as Jason climbs in the back seat. Peter drives off.

Peter: GET IN THE BOOT, PAIGE! THE CAR IS ALREADY MOVING!

Paige gets in the trunk and closes the lid.

Meanwhile, Jason presses his face against the part of the back window that didn't break when Paige went through it.

Jason: Whoa. The name of the fair has changed.  
Peter: Oh, yeah? What's it say?  
Jason: "JON'S CROSSOVER CRISIS"...


	6. The Plan

Welcome to iFruit. Hug me.

ACCESS GRANTED

STARTING UP...

LOADING OPERATION SOARING EAGLE...

OPENING NANOHARD WIERD...

EQUIPMENT:

HUNGER GAMES BOOKSET

HUNGER GAMES MOVIE

BOW

DART ARROWS

JASON THE NERD CODE NAME: NERDBOY

PETER THE IDIOT CODENAME: EAGLE TWO

TOTALLY DUMB PAIGE CODENAME: SKINCREAM

NICOLE FO DA WIN! CODENAME: EAGLE LEADER

Paige: Er... Sorry, Pete. Jason's been editing it.

Peter: Right.

1. WATCH HUNGER GAMES MOVIE

2. WAIT FOR JASON THE KING FTW!

Peter: O-kay... I know you wouldn't do that for all the shopping sprees in the world...

2.534938534854743. FIND OUT WHAT THE MEANING OF LIFE IS

Peter: Now I believe you.

3. EAGLE LEADER TO POSITION ALPHA

4. SKINCREAM TO POSITION BRAVO

5. EAGLE TWO TO POSITION CHARLIE

Paige: That's the front porch, treehouse, and iFruit, respectively.

6. FIRST TO FIND CONTACT CALL BACKUP

7. AFTER NERDBOY LEAVES FOV, MOVE IN TO POSITION DELTA

Paige: That's his room.

8. NERDBOY WILL GO TO POSITION ECHO. PROCEED WITH HASTE.

Peter and Paige: His bathroom.

9. NERDBOY WILL HAVE AN AMMO DROP LOCATED AT POSITION FOXTROT. HE WILL SECURE IT AND MOVE TO POSITION GOLF

Paige: Position F is his bathtub & Position G is your bath, Peter. Your bed and bath rooms and mine are identical, but under each other.

10. NERDBOY MAY HIDE IN POSITION GOLF. EAGLE LEADER TO POSITION INDIA. EAGLE TWO TO POSITION HOTEL. SKINCREAM TO POSITION JULIET

Paige: Hotel is your shower, Pete. India is just outside your bathroom, on either side of the doorways. Juliet is under your bed.  
Peter: Good luck with that.

11. AFTER NERDBOY IS AMBUSHED BY EAGLECO MINUS ONE, SKIN CREAM ATTACKS FROM COVER

Paige: Eagleco is the collective name for us.

12. NERDBOY WILL MOVE TO POSITION KILO ONE, EAGLECO TO POSITION KILO TWO

Paige: Kilo One is the bathroom at the near end of the hallway where your room is. Kilo Two is the one on the far end.

13. EAGLE TWO TAKES CARE PACKAGE AT POSITION LIMA AND MOVES TO KILO ONE

Paige: The Care Package is in the bath and it contains one of Sallybrown's sets of powder blue oxford shirts and black slacks.  
Peter: Who's Sallybrown?  
Paige: Daddy.  
Peter: So I'm gonna walk into the bathroom dressed as Dad?  
Paige: No. You're gonna walk past it.  
Peter: Less risky?  
Paige: Less ludicrous.  
Peter: But why is Dad's codename "Sallybrown"?  
Paige: Because he will be just as oblivious as Sally Brown.

14. SALLYBROWN WILL BE IN POSITION MIKE. EAGLE TWO INTERCEPTS PACKAGE DROP AND EAGLECO MOVES TO POSITION NOVEMBER. NERDBOY SHOULD BE RELOADING OR HIDING IN BATH WHEN EAGLECO MOVES TO NOVEMBER

Paige: Mike is Daddy's office, ask him for some stuff for a project or something and move to the elevator.  
Peter: Got it.  
Paige: Good.

15. WHEN NERDBOY RUNS BY TO FLIGHT OF STAIRS, EAGLE TWO HOLDS HIM OFF WHILE SKINCREAM MOVES TO POSITION OSCAR AND EAGLE LEADER TO POSITION PAPA

Paige: Papa is beside the elevator, and Oscar is around the corner from the stairs. And I'm sorry.  
Peter: What?  
Paige: Jason didn't edit it. Jason may have guessed the password, but he'll never type it.

16. EAGLE TWO AND NERDBOY RUN TO OSCAR AND EAGLECO GREEN TO FIRE

Peter: You really HAVE studied your military code.  
Paige. Thanks.

17. NERDBOY WILL RETREAT TO NOVEMBER. EAGLECO SPLITS UP TO SEARCH THE BUILDING. EAGLE TWO TO POSITION GOLF. EAGLE LEADER TO POSITION QUEBEC. SKINCREAM TO POSITION ROMEO. EAGLECO GREEN TO FIRE

Paige: Quebec is Jason's bath, Romeo is under his bed, and Papa is your bath.

18. CHASE NERDBOY TO POSITION SIERRA. EAGLE LEADER TO POSITION TANGO AND EAGLE TWO TO POSITION UNIFORM

Paige: Sierra is the front of our skyscraper house. Tango is behind on the left side, and Uniform is behind on the right side.

19. NERDBOY WILL RUN TO POSITION VICTOR, THEN X-RAY. EAGLES LEADER AND TWO SHALL BE GREEN TO FIRE, SKINCREAM WILL BE GREEN AFTER REACHING WHISKEY

Paige: Victor is Marcus's house next door, X-ray is the forest directly across the street. I set up a sniper's roost on the roof of our home. From here on in, eagleco will refer to only you and Nicole.

20. EAGLECO TO POSITION YANKEE. OPEN GLASS HOLES AND RETURN FIRE FROM NERDBOY

Paige: Yankee is Nicole's house, to the left of X-ray. You go park your car there after, tell Nicole that Operation soaring eagle is a go. Glass holes are windows.  
Peter: Affirmative. Do I use a bow, too? Like you?  
Paige: Negative. Ask Eagle Two if you can borrow a toy dart gun.  
Peter: Roger.  
Paige: We'll call the car Jeep. from now on you will address me as "Commander Paige", Nicole as "Captain Nikki", and you can be "Lieutenant Fox".  
Peter: Can I bring Steve?  
Paige: That cute Steve Riley? He can be callsign "Eagle One". He can be "Second Leiutenant Riley".  
Peter: I swear, if you call Steve "cute" once more, Commander, the "freindly fire" rule will be broken.  
Paige: Here. put these HUD sunglasses on. Its got a radio to converse with EAGLECO, and if you look at me, it says "Cmdr. Fox", if you look at Nikki, it says "Cpt. Nicole", I'll program these to say "2ndLt. Riley" when you look at Stevie later. And if you look at your own hand...  
Peter: This time the green text says "Lt. Fox".  
Paige: Look at Jason throught this sniper scope on my bow.  
Peter: Hmm. This time there's red text. It says "Cmdr. Nerdboy".  
Paige: And if you look at Marcus, the red text says "Cpt. Jones".  
Peter: Roger. Over and out.  
Paige: Skincream calling Eagle Two, do you read me? Over.  
Peter: Skincream, read you loud and clear.  
Paige: Don't say "Over and Out", just say "Out".  
Peter: Affirmative, Skincream. Out.

21. TAKE JEEP TO ZULU AND USE CARE PACKAGE TO NEUTRALIZE NERDBOY AND STEEL

Paige: Steel is Marcus.  
Peter: Affirmative, Commander.  
Paige: Attend positions at 1500 hours. Dismissed.


	7. Operation Soaring Eagle

**Author note: This chapter is POV of Peter. so text without a speaker is spoken by Peter.**

"Nerd Slaying"

Tuesday, 8th October 2013

Lt. Peter "Eagle Two" Fox

3:02:34 PM

Objective updated. Search for Nerdboy.

Cpt. Nikki: Target sighted. Am I green?

Cmdr. Fox: Negative, Eagle Leader. I see him coming. Eagle One! get to Position Beta- I mean Bravo! Meet me there!

2ndLt. Riley: Negative, Nerdboy is passing.

Cpt. Nikki: Fire darts?

Cmdr. Fox: Hold your fire, move up.

Cpt. Nikki: Roger.

Cmdr. Fox: _You're green! Nerdboy is climbing to Bravo!_

_Objective complete. Objectives updated. Chase Nerdboy._Jason: Huh? OW!

Cpt. Nikki: Nice shot, Leiutenant! High five!  
2ndLt. Riley: Thanks. These are slick darts.

HE'S RUNNING!

Cpt. Nikki: Advance to Delta, move!

HE'S GOT AN RPG!

Cmdr. Fox: PAINT OR DART?

PAINT!

2ndLt. Riley: We are screwed.

Cpt. Nikki: He's descending to Golf, go!

Cmdr. Fox: Riley! Stick with Captain Nikki!

Cpt. Nikki: _He's in_ _the bath. Eagle One to India. Eagle Two to Hotel. Skincream, to Juliet._

_Roger._

Cmdr. Fox: You're green.

Jason: AAAA!

He's running.

Objectives updated. Dress up as Jon and sneak over to Sallybrown's location. Chase Jason.

Cpt. Nikki: To Kilo Two. Eagle Two, switch your primary for the care package. keep your sidearm hidden.

Roger.

* * *

Objective Complete. Objectives updated. Obtain useful items from Sallybrown. Chase Jason.

_I'm at Mike. I see Sallybrown. _Hey, Jon. Can I have some toothpicks and pens and stuff? I'm doing a project.  
Jon: Sure, Pete.

Thanks.

Objective complete. Chase Jason.

2ndLt. Riley: Move up?  
Affirmative. Proceed with caution and haste.  
Cpt. Nikki: Copy that.  
Cmdr. Fox: Roger that.  
2ndLt. Riley: Copy, Eagle Two.

Objectives updated. Hold off Jason.

Cmdr. Fox: He's coming. Go!

Eat Styrofoam, Jason!

Objective complete.

Cmdr. Fox: Eagleco, They are coming. You are green!

Jason: AAAAAA!

Cpt. Nikki: Gotcha!

Elevator: Ding.

Jason: YES!

Jon: I love the sound of children playing.

Objectives updated. Search for Jason.

Move. **MOVE! ****_MOVE!_**

**__**Cpt. Nikki: Riley, on me!

2ndLt. Riley: I see him.  
Cpt. Nikki: He's at the entrance!

Cmdr. Fox: EagleCo, Move! I'll be on the roof!

ROGER! MOVING TO TANGO!

Objective complete. objectives updated. Run to Position Tango.

Cpt. Nikki: He's gone to Victor, now X-ray. He's got Steel.

Roger.

Cpt. Nikki: Fox, take point! you lead the squad!

OKAY! TO YANKEE!

Objective complete. Objectives updated. Lead EagleCo to Position Yankee.

2ndLt. Riley: Copy, Eagle Two.

Lt. Fox: Return fire, Eagle Leader! EagleCo will move to the back of the forest to secure the package!

Get in the Jeep, Lieutenant Riley!

2ndLt. Riley: Copy, sir.

Drive to Position Zulu and receive the paintball gun.

Cpt. Nikki: Package is intercepted, repeat, the package has been intercepted, over!

2ndLt. Riley: Crud. **_EAGLE LEADER, COME ON! SKINCREAM, I HOPE YOU HAVE A SNIPER PAINTBALL GUN, OUT!_**

**_Objective failed._**

**__**Jason: See this? A Darth Vader Lightsaber. Marcus? Got your Luke Skywalker Lightsaber?

Marcus: You bet!

Objectives updated. Defeat Jason.

We have Lightsabers, too. Riley, you take Steel. I'll take Nerdboy.

Jason: WHAT?!  
Marcus: I like my codename better.

Cmdr. Fox: ABORT OBJECTIVE! I AM BEING TORTURED BY BUCKY! HE... I'M HANGING OFF THE LEDGE!

STANDBY SKINCREAM, WE ARE ON ARE WAY TO ASSIST! KEEP YOUR HEAD! OUT!

Obectives updated. Save Paige.

Marcus and Jason: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Care for a teamup?

Marcus: Sure!

Alright... Riley... recruit the others... Corporal Charlie Brown... Callsign Goodgrief... Sergeant Snoopy... Callsign... Cutiepuff, Jr... Private... Satchel Pooch... Cutiepuff... Peacefighter... EagleCo will meet you there. Come in Eagle Leader!

Cpt. Nikki: I'm down! Cmdr. Fox is rebelling!

2ndLt. Riley: Nah, She's been compromised by Bucky, Codename Cutiecat.

Cpt. Nikki: I hurt all over. You go. I'll... just read some hunger games... in my medikit... I'll catch up with you later... out!

Bucky: I will use this hammer to whack your fingers, one by one, until you fall. but first...

Cmdr. Fox: _**HELPHE'SGONNASMASHMYRADIOANDHITMYFINGERSHURRY!**_

_**Commander Fox is hanging by all eight fingers.  
**_Cpt. Nikki: He smashed her radio! He's gonna hit her fingers until she falls! He's got a hammer!

2ndLt. Riley: COPY, EAGLE LEADER! WE ARE RECRUITING NEW HELP! OUT!

Roger Eagle One!

2ndLt. Riley: Nikki is WIA! Hurry, Eagle Two!

Cpl. Brown: I'm the Paint Explosion Specialist? Cool!

Sgt. Snoopy: I'm higher up than The Round-Headed Kid? Alright! Here's the world-famous French Foreign Legion soldier being transferred to the second division in the Fox Army.

Pvt. Pooch: Hmm. Nice.

Commander Fox is hanging by seven fingers.

2ndLt. Riley: C'mon, men! go, go, go!

Lt. Fox is in the third floor.

2ndLt. Riley: Hup! Hup! Hup! Get in the elevator!

Commander Fox is hanging by six fingers.

Lt. Fox is on the fifth floor.

2ndLt. Riley: C'MON! LET'S GO! A PERSON'S LIFE IS AT STAKE!

Commander Fox is hanging by five fingers.

Lt. Fox is in the ninth floor.

2ndLt. Riley: MOVE YOUR BUTTS!

Commander Fox is hanging by four fingers.

Lt. Fox is on the seventeenth floor.

2ndLt. Riley: HURRY UP, YOU ANCHOVIES!

Commander Fox is hanging by three fingers.

Lt. Fox is on the twentieth floor.

2ndLt. Riley: HURRY, YOU COWS!

Commander Fox is hanging by two fingers.

Lt. Fox is on the twenty-fifth floor.

2ndLt. Riley: ALMOST THERE! RUN! RUN FOR A TEEN GIRL'S LIFE!

Lt. Fox is on the twenty-ninth floor.

2ndLt. Riley: _**COME ON!**_

_**Paige is hanging by one finger.**_

Lt. Fox is on the thirtieth floor and is climbing the ladder to the roof.

2ndLt. Riley: Get out of the elevator! Movemovemove!

Objective failed.

Cmdr. Fox: HELP!

Cpl. Brown: Gotcha!

Mission complete.

Cmdr. Fox: Thanks. Promoted to Staff Sergeant!

Cpl Brown: Thanks!

Cpt. Nikki: I'm okay now.

Pfc (Private First Class) Fox: HA! (He shoots Commander Fox.)

Cmdr. Fox: Jason, I'm gonna kill you! Nerdboy has gone rouge, repeat, Jason has gone rouge!


	8. Generic Disaster

Peter: Alright, weight set... my left arm is ready to kick it up a notch...

Paige: Why does Daddy have to keep all his "_ of the Year" Awards in my room?

Jason: I wonder what happens when you grow hemlock in a pot made of magnesium.

Liz: Maybe I'll make cheese pizza for dinner.

Jon: Liz, you're new here, right?

Garfield: Yeah!

_Peter's left arm, however, is still not strong enough. The weight falls on his stomach, making him pass out on the ground. This has enough force to knock over Paige's bookshelf. It contains a genetically engineered tiger, made to resemble... "Hobbes". If you haven't heard of him, well...  
_The tiger runs free, however, Bucky is under the bed. Paige was trying to find him, and upon looking under the bed, she is knocked out by a flying notepad.

Jason: AAAAAA! FIRE! FIRE! fire brigade call!

Computer: Dialling 911...

Jason: I hear water makes it spread. Throw some clay on it. No clay. RUN!

_Jason spots C4 in the wall as exits the room, and tells Jon before he goes out._

_As the fire brigade arrive, Jon comes out to greet them._

Jon: Good thing you came early. In there there's a weightlifter wannabe that passed out after dropping his weight on his stomach, a passed-out teen with a cat scratching her face to wake her up so they can escape, a kid that started a magnesium-and-hemlock fire, and C4 in the walls, and it turns out, I had saved the building from being demolished! Oh, and there's a woman trying to catch a genetically engineered tiger in a pet carrier. Take care the house won't blow up in your face!


	9. Epilouge

Jon: It's come a long way. Peter, don't you think it's about time?

Peter, Paige, Jason, Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Bucky and Satchel: Wow, just LOOK at all these AWESOME presents!

Peter: You're alright... Dad.

Jon: Aw, thanks, son.

**Author conclusion: Yunno, there was actually a loose plot- trying to get Peter to welcome Jon as a father. my next fanfic will be the sequel. "Call of Foxtrot". It's like Operation Soaring Eagle, but made into a storyline itself.**


End file.
